Older gay man
is a community for older gay men and the men who love them. Community for those gay men over the age of Most of the gay spaces in reddit are run by very young members of the LGBT community. This space is for those of us older who have been through much more and can't always relate to what the younger guys are feeling. In the LGBTQ community, there are numerous stories of self-discovery and identity, yet one subject remains deeply misunderstood—intergenerational relationships.
Daniel Felsenthal, a year-old man, provides a rare glimpse into this experience, sharing his journey of loving much older men, including his year-old husband. Here’s a list of notable films featuring stories of older gay men, capturing themes of love, self-acceptance, and resilience in later stages of life: more.
Read, below, and check out a selection of 15 portraits from Complicit, which you can purchase here. What specifically drew you to the portrait subjects of older gay men? Why do you feel it's important to highlight them? I wanted to make emotionally vulnerable portraits and intimate scenes of older men. Posted October 12, Reviewed by Lybi Ma. Thomas Gass, a dentist in California, has survived the curse—twice.
The curse? Gass is a gay man whose only sexual attraction is to men significantly older than he is. After recovering from his grief , he found love again with a man 18 years older but endured another tragic loss when his second partner died of pancreatic cancer after they had spent 17 years together. Still a relatively young man, Gass might wonder whether or not to take a chance on loving an older man again.
For him, however, the choice is between an older man or no man at all.
I began to study same-sex relationships with age disparities while conducting research for my book, Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight. The younger men have more interest in sports than their partners and their gay peers who are attracted to men their own age. The younger men tend to be more masculine than their gay peers who are attracted to men their own age.
The younger men prefer older men with endomorphic bodies belly fat, strong bones, and sturdy thighs. While these observations are purely anecdotal and subjective, the comments resonated with some of my own observations. I would add another:. The younger men I interviewed seemed drawn to men freed from the tyranny of testosterone , expressing their greater attraction to wisdom , stability, commitment, experience, and maturity.
Gass went on to say that these relationships are often misunderstood, perhaps especially by the LGBTQ community. In , the New York Times published an opinion piece by former Pennsylvania Senator Harris Wofford , who at 90 years old was planning to marry Matthew Charlton, his year-old lover, whom he had been together with for 15 years. Senator Wofford had spent nearly half a century married to his wife, Clare, who died when they were both almost Various derogatory labels are used to describe such couples: sugar daddy, gold digger, trophy husband, or boy-toy.
But in the case of a celebrity, the tabloid headlines these labels may be used in sensationalistic ways, or even include more virulently homophobic names like pedophile and predatory pervert. Although atypical, are these relationships abnormal? Another part of the curse, though, is the prejudice and misunderstanding that these couples face, often receiving their greatest criticism from members of their own LGBTQ community.
Even the older partner initially may doubt the seriousness of the younger man's interest. In fact, however, many of the younger men are more independent and financially secure than their older partners, and they resent the implications that surround their motivations. When the older man has children—sometimes older than his partner—many incorrectly doubt that the couple will be accepted by family members, predicting family discord on a staggering level.
But these gay couples may be far more sexually active than many same-sex couples.
older gay men dating sites
It has been suggested that satisfying sex cannot occur without wet kisses and swelling organs, which reduces gay sexuality to nothing more than sex, and it implies that older men are incapable of having erections. But sex that has both emotional and physical intimacy and when it is expressed in slow time, it may be far more satisfying. No age cutoff exists for exciting, interesting, and satisfying sex. Behavior and identity are not the same things; they are not consistent from one person to the next or sometimes even within the same individual.
How we express our sexuality depends on many variables, including socialization, culture, religion, geography, and psychological health. Sexuality is likely more fluid than once thought. It says, "I belong somewhere, and I am not alone. Such beliefs are based on stereotypes.